Writer’s Block. Wikipedia says Writer’s block is a condition, primarily associated with writing as a profession, in which an author loses the ability to produce new work. The condition varies widely in intensity. It can be trivial, a temporary difficulty in dealing with the task at hand.
For me, it’s often not a period, but a blockage that keeps shifting bases in my brain. Only instead of hemorrhage, it causes inability to write, or more correctly, inability to think anything worthwhile to write. But this time, it’s not a hemorrhage. This time it’s a block. The solid, old, writer’s block. And of a different kind. The writer’s block that I’m experiencing doesn’t allow me to write, or even think at length, about things which are personal, abstract, or opinions which are personal to some extent. And I know why this all is happening.
I’m trying to numb the turbulence created in my brain due to some incidents. Now, to stop that wild turbulence from affecting any of my life’s areas and destroy it, I have to try my best to anesthetize it, to numb it down to a state of suspended shock. Even in this endeavor I’m not entirely successful because it is there, always, at all times. I’m ignoring it persistently, focusing on other things in the hope it will go. In my efforts to ignore it persistently, in my efforts to anesthetize the turbulence, the other type of turbulence, the creative turbulence invariably ends up getting anesthetized too. I can’t help it. If I’ve to escape from some personal corrosive incident, I’ve to shut out the whole personal stuff altogether. And this segregation, creates this writer’s block.
It’s okay, completely cool for me to write about books, or music, or mangas if I like. But here, on Prairie Wind, I am at a loss what to write. When I search my mind for already stored topics to be written in future, I find nothing. My brain has quarantined everything away from the conscious. And I don’t know what would have happened if it all had been there. Thankfully it’s not. So basically it’s just emptiness. Words, but no framework to embed them into.
Anyways it looks like I managed to squeeze few words at least through the personal mental block, hehe. I see a fallow period in the coming days. End-semester examinations are coming on swiftly, just 10 days away. They’re much better alternative to occupy my mind with, with all the anxiety, tension and hectic activity.